Some plumb good ideas to holler about!

By Amanda Dunn

In celebration of ‘Talk Like a Grizzled Prospector Day’ today...

Howdy folks! ‘Tis Rowdy Dunn here! Dagnabbit, when a feller (or a gal, God bless ‘er!) done gone lose his or her legs or arms, now I figger that’s just a doggone shame – unless I bring to mind Stumpy McGinnis, who was just gosh-darned careless and lost his leg when his moonshine-muddled mind figgered the fuse on that dynamite to be five feet more’n it was! 

No, I be talkin’ about them that are braver ‘n’ all of us – even me and my buddy, Big Bear, who chisel the rocks outta them thar hills with our bare hands mornin’, noon and night in search of somethin’ more ‘n fools gold.
No, I be talkin’ about our brave service men and women, who’d face down Ol’ Brown the rattlesnake (or that doggone villainous curmudgeon, Osama bin Laden and his infernal snakebit followers) with nary a blink of an eye.

They don’t need a whole heap of wailing and caterwauling, or a’hootin’ and a’hollering’, about the sitchiation in which they find themselves. What they really need is help. 

And that’s exackerly what them kind QL+ folks in good Ol’ Virginie are all about. I done heard that they’re inventing all sorts of newfangled whatjamecallits in nearby San Luis Obispo to help our brave heroes. Things like special knives so’s they can cut their bread and spread their butter, chairs with wheels on ‘em that’ll climb mountains, and even prosthetic legs to help ‘em ice skate – although why anyone’d want ter ice skate is beyond me. I’s had me enough of snow ‘n’ ice to last me a lifetime up there in the Klondike in '88.

I says as those QL+ folks must be down-right smart! Not like Crazy Caleb Campbell and his daft ideas about carriages with no horses attached on ‘em, Apples that tell the time and the weather, and other such ridickerlous cockermamie notions!